Links: Tuesday, February 25th

February 25, 2014 Links 2

A twenty-something year old woman stands next to her grandmother. The older woman is wearing a bright blue shift dress and flats. The younger woman wears her grandmother's floral patterned shirt, dark blue pants and comfortable shoes.Young People Swap Clothes With Grandparents And Parents

  • A Rape Survivor on Writing “Non-Con” – Belleau writes a powerful meditation on being someone who’s experienced rape and writing non-con erotica. As someone who’s experienced sexual assault and reads non-con erotica, I found myself nodding along with her post.

    Survivor or not, all women have been affected by rape culture and the demonization of female sexuality, and all of us work through it and react to it in different ways. Rape fantasy is one of those ways. As long as you keep the fantasies in the realm of fiction: you don’t act them out with unwilling partners, you don’t force people to read or hear about them, you don’t make unwilling survivors the subject of your fetish by using their real-life experiences for sexual fodder . . . As long as it’s fantasy, and as long as it’s consensual where it counts … I think we have a right to our fantasies. We have a right to accept them and a right to find them troubling and want to move past them.

  • Romance authors expose what’s on their keeper shelves – I always like to see what books authors keep on their own shelves, and this post delivers.

    Ah, the keeper shelf. We romance readers LOVE our keeper shelves. I’ve always found it fascinating to ask authors what’s on their keeper shelves, because if anyone knows good romances, it’s romance authors. HEA asked some of our favorite authors to take a look at the second shelf of their keeper bookcase and pick out the third book from the left. Here’s what they found …

  • Why I’m no longer talking to white people about race – This post is a reminder to those of us who argue from a position of privilege that our defensiveness and denial takes a real toll on the people we argue with. It’s not a fun academic exercise for everyone.

    Amidst every conversation about Nice White People feeling silenced by conversations about race, there is a sort of ironic and glaring lack of understanding or empathy for those of us who have been visibly marked out as different for our entire lives, and live the consequences. It’s truly a lifetime of self-censorship that people of colour have to live. The options are: speak your truth and face the reprisal, or bite your tongue and get ahead in life. It must be a strange life, always having permission to speak and feeling indignant when you’re finally asked to listen. It stems from white people’s never questioned entitlement, I suppose.

  • I Don’t See Color – Michi Trota – Trota writes a great examination of being Asian in a majority-white culture and struggling with internalized white supremacy.

    There’s a passage from David Byunghyun Lee’s powerful essay about growing up Asian in America that encapsulates what I’ve struggled for most of my adult life to articulate about my relationship with racial identity:

    “[W]hen [our parents] saw that their children could perform as white, they encouraged it without teaching us or telling us to love our Asian side. And as the line between performing as white and being white blurred, so did the line between thinking white people are better and thinking that being white is better. In hindsight, our biggest mistake was having believed in the line at all.”

    Nowhere has the absence of that line become more apparent than in my own writing. Every piece of fiction I’ve ever written has been based around white characters. The short story I wrote about a family dealing with parental loss like mine? All white characters. The aborted fantasy tetralogy I spent years outlining and rewriting the first five chapters for? The main characters were all white, and the setting was another Tolkienesque pseudo-Western Europe. When I Mary Sue’d myself into my fan fiction, I wrote myself as a white girl. Apparently it never once occurred to me to write any Asian characters, much less as protagonists, even when they were supposed to be me.

  • Writing Disability – Disability in Kid Lit hosted a Twitter chat where authors, bloggers and readers talked about writing disability and how they try to get it right.

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An ice hockey fan from north of Boston and the genre's most beloved troll, Ridley enjoys reading contemporary and historical romance, as well as the odd erotica novel. As someone who uses a wheelchair, she takes a particular interest in disability themes.

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2 Responses to “Links: Tuesday, February 25th”

  1. Meoskop

    Glad you included the dubcon/noncon piece. She draws a good line about addressing sexuality vs romance vs real life. Really liked it.

  2. Roslyn Holcomb

    I agree totally about the not discussing race with white people. A good friend of mine made the point that black people discussing race with white people is like going to rehab because your neighbor is a crackhead. Racism and white supremacy were created by, and for the benefit of, white people. It will not go away until and unless it is no longer of benefit to them. It is their psychosis, not mine and I refuse to be co-dependent in their insanity any longer.